PinnedSo We’re Okay. We’re Fine.A few nights ago I saw the Indigo Girls for the first time. No, I’m not kidding. Yes, I spent half of highschool singing their songs on any stage that would have me. Yes, I spent most of my twenties’ free time and money as a concert-goer. Yes, I even…Grief And Loss5 min readGrief And Loss5 min read
PinnedFranceI can feel my daughter’s easy breath rise and fall in the bed next to me. She is fourteen. But not the fourteen I remember being, all insecurity and self-loathing. She does not dance for her dinner as I did at her age–looking to please, hoping someone other might hand…4 min read4 min read
PinnedLosing My Religion (and then some)When I stopped attending my mother’s beloved Catholic Church, I did it on the sly. I was in my early twenties sitting in a pew just blocks from my first adult apartment, aching to live a purpose-filled life. I remember the priest raising his voice. I remember a fist pounding…4 min read4 min read
Dec 11, 2022The LightSome Sunday mornings when I am particularly lucky, I get to spend a hour or two in the woods walking with my friend, Eva. Eva is an Episcopal priest. We met years ago, when we were both more of less comfotably installed in a nearby church. For different reasons we…3 min read3 min read
Oct 10, 2022A Continental Divide(published orginally on the author’s blog) My family is on a road trip of sorts. Two weeks ago we piled the car with three kids, a few backpacks, and a clutch of CDs that would promise my children hours of 80’s musical education if nothing else. People are quick to…6 min read6 min read
Jun 22, 2022Homecoming(Previously published on author’s blog) I have been dreaming of boats. White sails looking for a shoreline, nowhere to land. My sleep is precious and petulant again. I’ll sleep ten hours one night, then only two. More than once this week, I’ve bolted upright, disoriented with panic in my own…2 min read2 min read
Jun 8, 2022A Day of Father’sMy father died in this house. So did my mother. The one I am sitting in now, writing this. My father almost exactly three years ago. For months before his death, I’d been back and forth seamlessly to sit with and mark time. Some of the easiest moments of our…5 min read5 min read
Jun 8, 2022Washing of the FeetFriday would have been my father’s 83rd birthday. I wonder when I will stop doing that…counting the years he didn’t live? He died almost exactly a year after being diagnosed with cancer. His death accurately predicted by doctors who know about this sort of this. Last summer my mother died…6 min read6 min read
Jun 8, 2022Getting Your Llama to MateTwo summers before my dad died I was at the pool with my seven-year-old daughter. We’d paid the small college tuition to join in the hopes that our kids would do swim team thus solving perennial “our kids need more exercise” and “what are they going to do all summer”…7 min read7 min read
Jun 8, 2022FaithThis morning I “ran” the stairs at the National Cathedral (I’m 46 and pretty out of shape. Do we really further need to address the quotes?) If you follow my Instagram (meghan.riordan.jarvis) you know I’ve spent a fair amount of time in the Bishop’s Garden since quarantine began. The National…2 min read2 min read
